Mental illness is so real.
We hear that so many fathers who are a deadbeat Dads, or walk away from the home and leave their kin behind, but are we asking men to be that perfect father without giving them guidance to do it?
Throughout history men were absent from the home, they went to war for years at a time, they had to work away from the family, fatherhood was just seeding or when the time was right, taking their sons and teaching them how to be a man, the girls were just to make good marriages.
It was the woman’s role to raise a child, the Mama, Grandma the village, men were not in the day to day of it. So why do we expect so much from a man to be a hands-on Dad when genetically, environmentally and culturally he has not brought or taught to do so?
I am seeing today more and more young men taking on fatherhood today, getting right down with it from birth to diapers to everyday chores of parenting, why is this? Is it because the Mum’s are working with careers of their own? Is it because it is sexy to be a hands-on Dad? Is it because the desire to be an interactive father has become something so inviting to a man?
So many grown children feel abandoned by their fathers, but if we understand that it is not the child, or even the Mother, but the culture and DNA of a man, we might reach out to them with more understanding.
The past generation was at the forefront of women in the workplace, they carried such guilt and tried to be everything to everyone, very often at her own expense. The Men had to pick up the slack, but often found it hard, ‘I am the bread winner that’s the Mums job” but no, it is the parent’s job, and that is now today, seen as a gift instead of a core.
It is a luxury for a mother to stay at home to raise the children and most mothers are in the workforce. If a Dad leaves where does that leave the Mum? She has to work twice as hard to provide for her family and be a double parent to her children because today, grandparents and the village is not around to raise them for her.
So, we cannot have the old mentality of a man leaving because it suits him but instead show him not only the responsibility but the joy of being an interactive parent. Those Dads that embrace the gift of fatherhood get it, they know what wonderful thing it is to be a custodian of a child of the earth and can learn so much from their children about being a man a father a human being.
So, let us help our men discover the nurturer within them, help them see fatherhood as that gift, that joy and embrace the discoveries that are to be made through our children.
We see men staying at home to raise the kids because the mothers are earning more than them, we are seeing that there is no shame in this role reversal but instead an opportunity to seed water nurture our children into being all they can be. It takes a man who is strong within, a person at one with self and not succumbing to the ego or insecurity of what is perceived as a real man.
A real man is a man content within himself and confident to be a partner with his spouse and embrace being a father to his children. So let us help men see the benefits, the joy and the honour of being a father to their children, for that will build a better world, a more peaceful world and a world where respect and value of life can be realised because of on hands parenting.
We say there would be no wars he man birthed a child, for who would willingly send a child to die? But I think if men raised a child, full or part time, they would not be so quick to want a war but to find solutions to the world’s problems through interaction and communication that sees things from all sides. For that is what you learn as a parent, the be a coach, a counsellor, a nurture, a tutor, disciplinarian, and guide, a cheerleader and that teaches us skills in being a better person.
It is not always what we teach our children, but what they are here to teach us, for being an interactive parent, you learn so much from your children and we learn to live in gratitude, and simplicity of what really matters in life.
So MAMA’S of the world, teach your sons how to be better sons, better brothers, to respect their mothers, and to value all life equally with love and respect, what a difference it will make to this world and all who live on it.
While being pregnant can be a trying and often times uncomfortable experience, there are moments when being pregnant feels so magical and thrilling that we never want it to end. This is one of those moments .
The day kicked off by meeting Tash who was my make up artist. She made me look 14 and am too old .
One thing is for certain: there’s no other experience in life like it.
Behind the scene
Make up by Tash_patt :0715227455
You’ve entered my womb and made my life
I never thought I would be chosen for such an
It is a greater blessing than what I ever could ask.
I can almost imagine you in my mind.
Beautiful, happy, bouncing, flashing a smile so kind.
Feeling you flutter is a sensation like no other.
It does wonders for the joy of this soon-to-be-mother!
You create a glow in me I never knew I would see.
It is true happiness that sets me on cloud nine
manifested deep inside of me!
You’re my baby, my child, my heart, and my wonder.
I pray we create a bond that no one can put asunder.
You’re a designer’s original! A creation from the King!
I can hardly wait for you to enter the world and see the
joy you bring.
Sweet baby of mine, you’re a magnificent gift from
I hope you have eyes that will enable you look at all things wise
I hope you inherit my ability to plan.
With that you will be able to face all things in life as a
I hope you learn from my spirit and let no one take it.
Believe me, you will need it in life, and many will try to
With that you will be cautious of any door you enter.
I want you to have my curiosity.
There’s nothing wrong with questions you may blurt!
so you’ll know when to let go before getting hurt.
Have my big heart; know what emotions are and how
to be real.
Share my sense of humor! Laugh a lot; it helps you
Share my sense of duty. Know how to be
serious and take strife.
I’m emotional, so I tell you it’s okay to blubber once
and a while like your Mom.
I wish to teach you to love, respect, strength of mind,
and to care.
These are my feelings, wishes and hopes for you.
You make my heart and soul sing!
I welcome you to the world and thank you for the joy,
my little Queen
Today’s the first day of February- welcome!
Hope all of you have survived the January atmosphere and haven’t quite given up on your New Year’s Resolutions just yet (even if you have already, that’s okay, too). Lots of things have certainly happened this past month .
February is filled with the power of of love and love is like a drug.
It means that the love month just started ! its a season of love,flowers,chocolate.dates,expressing someone that you love them,giving cards,buying gifts and its the season where the stores is filled with hearts and valentines spirit.
This particular month is widely associated with a single-day affair which, funny enough, isn’t very forgiving for those who are single. What I’m talking about is Valentine’s Day, and it’s so interesting that a entire month is associated with this one day, commercial and all. I won’t get into my opinions on the holiday, but instead will save it for a different post. Although I’m pretty sure you already have an idea of how I feel about it
As a 22 year old its just makes me happy seeing everyone being loved,falling in love,and staying in love.love is commitment its something that you need to work for everyday seeing your special someone happy.Its makes you happy already and this is the season where you treat them out a night that you could cuddle it out, a day where you could travel,try new foods,giving gifts to each other,and just spending quality time.we all have different concept of love.and i thinks its pretty cool.
This valentines day am not sure what am going to do but i will find time express some love to someone. I know the month is unfair to the singles but share out some love maybe with your crush or someone. Dont worry some will get dump on the eve of valentine , phone calls will go unanswered while others will have a one night stand shit “casual relationship “Keep hope alive .
Im wishing everyone a happy valentines.I hope everyone will have the best time of their life.If something bad happen,there is a new day to start and be happy.The seasons of sweet treats just started bring it on !
Enjoy your month
“No, I don’t.”
“Whattt?! Why are you single? I mean, look at you, you’re pretty, smart, and bad ass..”
“I’m single cause I can be single..”
“No, you can’t. No one can be single for a long time.”
“Well, I can. A lot of people can.”
I am not probably the only one who is tired of hearing these questions all the time. Like, hello? what the fuck is wrong with being single? I chose to be single that’s why. I don’t need anyone who will constantly give me a headache. I will no longer grab a rock and hit it in my own head. I’m single because I have learned. I won’t waste any seconds to be with the wrong person. Some are asking, “I can’t believe it. A woman can’t be single for a long time.” Are you kidding? Seriously? I’m not gonna enter in a relationship just for the sake of sex, if that’s what you want to pertain. I won’t settle just because I’m comfortable having you around otherwise I would have lived with my friends cause I’m more comfortable having them around. Stop asking silly questions, because we are single doesn’t mean we are lonely.
You might be in a relationship, but are you happy? Can you answer that question real fast without any signs of hesitation? Newsflash, because you are in a relationship does that mean you’re happy and being single doesn’t make us sad neither.
I don’t understand why some women are okay with being treated like doormats. I don’t think you would get my point but you weren’t just born to be anybody’s doormat or accessories or something they need when they need some ego-boosters. You aren’t an object. You belong to no one. You belong to yourself. I belong to myself. Before he comes along, you have had your own identity darling, if he doesn’t treat you right, call it quit The worst part of martyrdom is to stay with someone and allow yourself to be his doormat in spite of knowing the fact that he doesn’t and would never love you; that he is just staying because you are good to his ego but when you look at his eyes, he sees a different person wishing you were her. And too bad, for the sake of having a companion, you are okay with that. But once you finally know your worth, you would stop chasing the love that you don’t deserve. You are a pearl in the midst of chaos. Still beautiful. Unbreakable. Worthy.
Why am I single?
Maybe I don’t need anybody. Perhaps, I haven’t met the man who will sweep me off my feet or I might have met him and I’m still not over him. Maybe I still want the same person who broke my heart or maybe not. Maybe I can’t be a girlfriend to anyone. Or maybe I am single because I am more comfortable being on my own…
2016 has been an amazing year for me. It was a year of growth. Each day was more a learning than an adventure. I meet so many people – online and offline, making a change in someone’s life (no matter however small!), and sharing a lot of stories with people whom I have never known earlier! It has been a great year.
Yes there have been some downsides too, but it has only helped elsewhere. I have let go somethings that i nurtured very dearly, though I was not too keen to take it up initially! It took me a while to let go but eventually I realized that the more I try to hold it closer, the more it made my life crazy! I let go of all the efforts, the days and nights and months and years I nurtured it. I finally let go and settled with another passion.
When things were not going good on one side, it started going double good on the other side. Have met awesome people in my life which enabled me to rediscover the goodness of being with friends, being able to express, being able to spend time with family, being able to manage without much sleep! Its passion that’s driving me more now, rather than determination! I guess what matters more is the outcome and I am pretty happy with whatever is happening around these days.
There’s a lot I learned in 2016, a lot about work, and about people. There were many who willingly helped me though I was hesitant to ask for help. There were also people who made me cautious; to interact with the right people. Yes, there were people whom I trusted who cheated without remorse! But those were outnumbered by so many people who willingly came forward to help! I strongly believed that if I do good, I will never have to regret and my trust was proven right many a times in 2016. It keeps me going stronger looking out for people who seek help that I can offer.
2016 has taught me the best of the best. I hope 2017 brings even more people into my life, elevating my experience. As always, I anticipate the best, prepare myself for the worst and take things as they come.
To sum it all, thanks to everyone who stood in the gap. Everyone who walked the 2016 journery with me . Am so humbled you supported me behold measures. I love you all.